Ok Moms, so I see it all the time- people posting on Facebook “my kids. my everything.” And there’s a part of me that’s like, oh yes, so much yes; they are the sun that rises, the rainbow that glimmers, the sweet apples of my eye and loves of my life. They are. But.
I think it’s a little dangerous to call your kids your “everything” and “my world.” First, it might be an indication that you’re raising narcissistic monsters; do you SAY that to them? Do they think they are actually everything? Second, you should not be the sum total of your children. You should also be your own hopes, talents, dreams, career, etc. I think that children need to see their parents pursuing something important to understand that they are one player in this game of life– not the everything.
This year, I started regularly running and going to zumba– exercising 4-5 days per week and essentially taking myself out of the home, when I already work full time. Sometimes I feel horribly guilty about it, but mostly I realize that I am doing something good for myself, which is in turn good for you. I am giving you a good example around physical health and body image, as well as showing you that the earth does not revolve around you and that Moms are people too. We have lives and hobbies and should be free to pursue them, and in fact feel totally fine with pursuing them. It’s what makes us who we are, and what’s going to make you into the awesome people you’re growing into.
So, maybe, let’s stop the sweeping statements about our children being our everything? Or just starting sharing things that are meaningful to you… that are not your children? Just a thought.